A very queasy New Year

Happy New Year, everyone.

It’s hard to believe, but I’m swiftly approaching the beginning of my very last semester at GSLIS. It feels like I just started the program yesterday, and I remember bemoaning the fact that 2 years seemed so long. Boy, was I wrong.

I’m happy to report that I survived IML and DIL and got As in both. I really didn’t expect the A in IML – I was thinking I’d get an A- – but I’m not going to complain.

I am looking forward to my next two classes, Metadata (590MDL) and Design of Digitally Mediated Information Services (590DEL). They appear to be nice “capstones” for my time here at GSLIS. That being said, I am so, so tired.

My dad asked me if I was going to pursue my PhD after getting my degree, and I said, “Um, no.” First of all, I’m more of a “practice” person than “research.” My favorite classes and assignments where when I actually got to do what we were talking about instead of just talk about it. I really don’t see myself doing research at this time. Secondly, I’m really tired of school. I love school, but I need the break. I think this disappointed my dad, who has always hinted that he envisioned me as some high-ranking professor at some prestigious university (ideally in the sciences, but Library Science sorta counts, right?), but he understood.

The challenge facing me now, in addition to surviving one more semester, is figuring out what the heck I want to do. I started off this program with the idea of working at a university. Well, two years and lots of upheaval at work later, I’m not so sure. I’ve spent my entire post-college working life at a university. I’m not so sure it’s what I want to keep doing. Like my dad, I think I had this very shiny vision of what academic life was supposed to be, but now, 10 years later, I realize that academia is just as fraught with politics, competition, and, yes, focus on the bottom line as anywhere else. There’s a definite class system in academia – or at least at my university and a few others I know of – that’s hard to escape. I’ve seen how librarians here, who have faculty status, are still treated somewhat like second-class citizens. Since I’m a staff person, I’m already a full-fledged second-class citizen, so I’m not sure if I want the “upgrade.”

Then there’s the issue of what I can do. I took a lot of classes around the idea of working in a digital library, but the entry-level jobs in that area are scarce. I suppose I could get a job as a reference librarian, but I was never interested in doing that – I’m still not interested today. When I look at the “non-traditional” LIS jobs that entail data/information modeling, information architecture, etc., there are a lot of skills I don’t have: SQL, JSP, perl, etc. So I’m feeling a little daunted there as well.

Anyway, as it’s time to begin the job search, I have a lot to consider. I didn’t anticipate ending the program feeling more unsure about where my future lay than when I started.
I do know that I want to leave where I am now. I’m never going to move beyond what I’m doing now where I currently am, and the job is no longer challenging or fun. I do want to put my new degree and knowledge to work. The rest is more open than I’d like.